Wednesday, August 31, 2016

Wednesday Linkfest II

Pieces of Margo: “Meet the Boys

Under Contract to My Wife: “The Doctor Is In

The Cut: “The Park Slope Husband Preparing for a Dominatrix Session

Pleasing Miss Pearl: “Ropes and Tea

Yes, I’m a Submissive Man!: “OM Into It

Learning and Living a FLR: “The Devil Is in the Details: Managing the Day to Day

Giles English: “Consent Isn’t Magic Because Submission Is Addictive

Her Subject: “Que Sera, Sera!

Im-hers: “Saturday Thoughts

Pieces of Margo: “Meet the Boys II

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

“A Date with Diana”

I had dates like this back in my long-ago single days. Not one involved a Wonder Woman costume and bondage, however.

On the plus side, not one involved crabs, either.

Monday, August 29, 2016

Well, That Didn’t Go According to Plan

I’m hardly an expert on choosing and wearing a male chastity device. I’ve worn a few (mostly cheaper knock-offs from Amazon) over the last two years, enough to get an idea of what will work for me and what won’t, what the sizing and spacing should be, basically all the things I’ll need to know when I finally purchase a high-quality device (or “the real one,” as I’ve come to think of it). And enough to know that I can go several days and nights wearing one without having to take it off. Hell, I even made it through a root canal wearing an earlier cage, so I honestly thought this week in a cage while my wife is away would be only minor problems at worst.

Things did not go according to plan.

Our current device, a Bird Cage type, looks great and even feels great, generally. A bit of a struggle to get the base ring on at times, because much like my experience with clothing, I’m apparently in between the available prefab ring sizes. One that goes on more easily doesn’t really hold the device in place, and one that holds the device securely doesn’t go on easily. Still, it can be done with a little patience. And given that I never even wore a cage until I was 50, I can do patience.

The gap between the base ring and the cage is more snug than I’d prefer, but it definitely makes for a secure hold. And I’d never had any problems with it before, no matter how many hours I’d worn it. The metal bars, allowing absolutely no leeway, felt wonderfully confining as well. I like the reminder the weight provides, too. Plastic or silicone just don’t hold that same charge for me.

Truthfully, I’d doubted I could manage wearing this thing the whole time my wife was away. She did, too, clearly. Lack of WiFi and cell reception at Burning Man wasn’t the only reason she left the key easily available.

Still, by the end of the first evening, I’d mostly forgotten the device was even on. A couple of vanilla life surprises kept me distracted that night, true, but it seemed a good start.

The night was uncomfortable. I woke up around 2:30 AM, and the tight spacing between the base ring and the bottom of the cage opening felt like it was rubbing me raw. I’d never spent a full night in this cage, but I’d dealt with discomfort wearing the last one, and I knew that the nights grew progressively easier. So, I bulled my way through it, got back to sleep, but woke up again around 5 AM.

This time, I felt beyond raw. Definitely beyond the previous “getting used to it” problems. Something was off, somewhere. And no matter how much I wanted this experience, part of me knew better. I got up, found the key, and took off the cage.

It felt like a defeat. Or like the candy you’d been promised turned out to be expired.

I tried things again the next afternoon. It was the easiest time I’d ever had putting it on, too, and there were no real problems throughout the rest of that day and evening. Other than that huge round of arousal late in the evening, of course. The cage itself was very tight and constricting (despite being a bit longer than ideal) and a constant reminder that my sexual release is dependent on someone else’s permission now. Sure, it would have been easy enough to just take it off again, but that would have defeated the point and made the lure of a disallowed orgasm even more tempting. And all the discomfort I was feeling clearly fell into the “good” pain category, unlike the night before.

I woke up several times during the second night, too, and felt more discomfort each time, until the cage and I hit a repeat of the previous night, and I took it off again.

Candy. Baby. Taken Away. You get the picture.

That was when I finally noticed that the gap between the cage and the base ring isn’t just narrow, it’s angled slightly inward. I don’t remember seeing this with any other cage, or maybe I just never paid enough attention to notice before. This cage works fine during the day, but something about lying down for several hours just doesn’t mesh with this thing and its awkward machining and/or engineering.

That was also when I noticed some abrasions on the underside of my shaft, which I also never had with the earlier devices. And strangely, which weren't quite where I'd been feeling that awful discomfort.

Damn it. I want my alone-time fetish-play candy.

It’s been back to the “Honor System” since then. Which is disappointing, because there’s an odd comfort I feel when wearing a device, like some true part of myself is getting fed or expressed. Clearly, I need to drop the bigger bucks for “the real one,” if and when the new house ever stops demanding my every spare dollar.

Maybe the house needs a cage itself, to finally make it behave as well as I’m trying to...

Friday, August 26, 2016

Fetish Rewrite XVII

That moment when you realize you’ve just outed yourself as a kinkster at the family BBQ...

Thursday, August 25, 2016

“Jon Davis Gets a Sex Robot”: Episode One

My wife and I actually had this conversation a few years ago. It went very differently for us, though.

Our argument over which sex robot to someday buy is ongoing...

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

The Envelope Please

Left behind for me, by my loving wife and owner...

You can guess what’s inside.

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Before She Leaves, Part II

[Still at dinner, last Friday night...]

Me: “So if there’s a problem and the cage needs to come off for some reason, I call you, and you tell me where the key is, right?”

Her: “No.”

Me: “No?”

Her: “That’s not practical, and you know it. Cell phone reception and wi-fi are spotty on the Playa. Remember the last time? We could barely get hold of each other, and when we could, we could barely hear each other, the connection was so awful.”

Me: “But then—”

Her: “I’ll leave you a sealed envelope. Inside will be a letter telling you where in the house the key is.”

Me: “So ... wait a minute... you mean I can just take it off if I want?”

Her: “No.”

Me: “Again, no?”

Her: “No. I want to see how long you can have it on it because I want you to wear it for me, not because I’m making your wear it. So I expect you to resist the temptation I’m leaving with you. Understand?”

Me: “That’s... Wow... I mean...”

Her: “Answer my question without the commentary please.”

Me: “Yes... I mean... Yes, Ma’am.... I understand.”

Her: “Good. Now, as long as we’re still on the subject, I might be staying longer than the week I’d originally planned...”

Monday, August 22, 2016

Before She Leaves, Part I

[At dinner, last Friday night...]

Me: “So, while you’re at Burning Man this year, will I have permission to—”

My Wife: “The cage goes on before I leave.”

Me: “...”

Her: “Weren’t expecting that, were you?”

Me: “You’ve never ... well... required the cage before.”

Her: “I am now.”

Me: “And when you went to that regional burn a few months ago, you gave me a blanket freedom to—”

Her: “That was then. This is now. You’re wearing the cage while I’m gone.”

Me: “...”

Her: “Different feeling, isn’t it, now that the reality of a week in the cage instead of just the fantasy is staring you in the face?”

Me: “Yes... Maybe... I mean, I’m surprised, that’s all.”

Her: “You mean that I would actually do this to you, finally?”

Me: “Yes.”

Her: “You still don’t realize how much I really am enjoying this, do you?”

Me: “I guess not.”

Her: “Make your peace with it. Because this is my decision, and you will abide by it.”

Me: “Yes, Ma’am.”

Her: “Good boy. Now, as long as we’re speaking about what you’ll be doing while I’m away...”

Friday, August 19, 2016

100 Posts

This is the 100th post for Kinkster of a Certain Age...

Thank you, everyone, for your readership, comments, links, agreements, disagreements, snark, compliments, back-handed compliments, and support!

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Pop Quiz: Newly FLR Motivational Edition

Q1: Which of the following is the best wording for my wife to use not only to get me to do something but also to actually enjoy doing it?

A: Could you do this for me, please?

B: We should do this.

C: Do this. Now.

Q2: Which of the following is often still the hardest wording for my wife to use not only to get me to do something but also to actually enjoy doing it?

A: Could you do this for me, please?

B: We should do this.

C: Do this. Now.

(Hint: The answers to both questions are the same.)

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

They’ll Be Standing There All Day

“I like your play party outfit.”

“Great minds. You’re a Dom, I’m guessing?”


“Finally! It’s so hard to find people who Top and bottom, isn’t it?”

“Very hard, yes.”

“People say they’re switches, but then they almost always lean submissive, am I right?”


“I lean mostly submissive, to be honest.”


“So do I, actually.”


“We’re going to be standing here all day, aren’t we?”

“You tell me.”

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Elust #85

Welcome to Elust 85 -

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you're looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it'll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #86 Start with the rules, come back September 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

The Case of the Purloined Panties

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

The Inspection Zone
Date with prey

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~


*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Erotic Fiction

After Dark
Night World Flash Fiction
Temper temper
How to Start Super Sex
Nobody Comes Looking For Me
it was time to play

Erotic Non-Fiction

Cunnilingus. The Most Special Intimate Kiss
Nastya is nasty
“Do you want to cum in my mouth?” A Memoir
Humiliation: Raylene's caning 2

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Come as you are...
A Case for Good Men
Changing Labels
10 Commandments of Courteous Casual Sex
The Aftermath
I miss you

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

Formative Kink: "Tanya, the Lotus Eater"
At his feet
Consent In Gorean Culture

Body Talk and Sexual Health


Thursday, August 11, 2016

Fetish Rewrite XVI

“Though bulky, inefficient, and often quite loud, early Femdom mind control technology was remarkably effective in the right hands...”

Wednesday, August 10, 2016

Formative Kink Epic Fail, Addendum: “Buck Rogers in the 25th Century”

True Doms of the 25th Century!

Can’t believe I missed this one. I am ashamed.

You just know these guys are creeping a little too close to someone else’s scene at a play party, don’t you?

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Other Times, I Really Do Think I Was Born Too Early

Sort-of Forties style. Women in uniform. Three Christina Aguileras. Again, so many kink buttons pushed.

Seriously, how did I miss this one until just this past week? Oh, right. Because it first came out ten years after I hit that age when you pretty much stop paying attention to new music by new artists, and circle back to live in that confortable gated musical community of bands you came of age listening to.

Sometimes, I really do think I was born too early.

Monday, August 8, 2016

Sometimes, I Really Do Think I Was Born Too Late

Forties style. Women in uniform. So many kink buttons pushed.

Sometimes, I really do think I was born too late.

Monday, August 1, 2016

Formative Kink: Dungeons & Dragons

Dungeons & Dragons was an awesome playground for all sorts of fetishes and kinks, especially in the campaigns I dreamed up and ran...

Tentacles. Succubi. Plant monsters. Bondage. You name it, I included it. There’s a reason the person who runs the game is called a “Dungeon Master,” after all.

Unfortunately, most of my junior high and then high school friends seemed rather relentlessly vanilla. And even if they actually were budding kinksters like myself, these cravings weren’t something we would have ever dared discuss. Peer pressure is strong even for teenage guys. So I kept these “interests” of mine as occasional flavoring to spice up and set apart the campaigns I wrote for us, and made sure not to show just how much more I enjoyed those portions of our games. (“Your campaigns are edgy, man!” one friend once told me. If he only knew...)

The campaigns I played on my own, however, were different beasts entirely. On a Venn diagram, they fell in the overlapping center of the choose-your-own adventure, kinky fan fiction, and waking wet dream circles. In those campaigns, I found myself captured and enslaved by Dominant Amazons, entangled and used by horny vegetation, drained of various vital life forces (and fluids) by dark demonesses, and enslaved by evil enchantresses. I also learned (repeatedly) that certain arrogant young wizards should heed a wiser master's warnings and just leave some spells well enough alone. It was like a pornographic Internet before the Internet even existed. It was Rule 34 before there even was a Rule 34. And I experienced all this without ever leaving my room—and, fortunately, without my mother ever walking in, because while she never bought into the whole “This game is Satanic and you’re going to go insane like that kid in that Mazes & Monsters book!” fervor of the 1980s, I doubt she would have approved of my particular storylines.

I haven’t played Dungeons & Dragons in years, even decades now. I’m still a gamer, though, even if mostly Fallout and Skyrim and the occasional Master of Orion-type galactic conquest game, at least when I can find a good turn-based one that lets me think through my moves rather than a real-time clickfest. And I still perv up these games, too, generally installing tens of kink, bondage, and other mods after finishing a vanilla play-through.

At some point, though, I need to learn how to create these mods myself. Because however great and kink-charged some of the currently available ones are, none is quite the perfect “kink fit” that my own Dungeons & Dragons campaigns were, back in my room when I was just a kid in puberty and worried my mother was going to come through that door...